I'm at a better place now than I was a month ago, so I guess this is working. By "this", I mean a mindful struggle to be consistently better. Anyways, here are the lessons for this month:
1. Create a process to overcome lethargy
2. Clarify; at the moment.
3. Don't preempt your behaviour
During this month at various times, I failed and fell. I was lethargic. At times in the morning, I simply didn't want to get out of the bed. One such morning I specifically remember that I scrolled memes for 3 hours, from 7 am to 10 am, missing both breakfast and office. However, this month, these states of inertia were more frequent but of less duration. So much so that the latest episode, which happened somewhere last week, was of just 3 hours. Before this, I used to properly feel depressed and would waste whole days at end. I find February a gain. If I keep pushing on, after a certain time, I'll be able to premortem these episodes, therefore replacing their occurrence completely with something beneficial. I hope so, In Shaa Allah.
Here are some quick tips for you to do when you are feeling lethargic and just don't want to get up:
Don't. Don't get up. Keep doing whatever you are doing. Only make up your mind that how much are you allowing yourself to be lethargic. Allocate time to your laziness instead of both feeling guilty and continuing to waste time. Give yourself a cushion of 10/20/30 mins and then at that time, spring up. This process is slow to follow, and most long lasting.
Make a "quickwin" task list. Quickwin stands for both "Quick window" and "Quick win". These are tasks that you can do with a minimal effort in small time. I've posted my list of quick wins here.
Have a look at that and it'll assist you in making your own. Completing any one of these tasks will give you motivation and change your mind from the intial state of "I-don't-want-to-do-anything" to "Let's-continue-this-streak-of-accomplishment". Remember, motivation depends on hustle, as opposed to the normal idea of hustle depending on motivation. Do a quick work to get a quick dose of motivation.
Give yourself lil regular treats. This is a lesser followed trick, and it works pretty good speaking from personal experience. I treat myself to a small Dairy Milk everytime I do a hard task. Hard tasks will vary for you from time to time. If procrastination gets to be your hard task anytime, then reward yourself everytime you start working, even though you wanted not to. Give yourself a dairy milk. Or an ice cream if you are out. Keep some sweets in your bag for yourself. Use human greed for sweet as a tool against procrastination.
Second thing which I will work on in this month is developing the habit of clarifying in the moment. In office, I noticed that I was getting intimidated by authority. This made me ask less questions. Their "office language" needed explanation for an intern. But I didn't ask for it. I thought I'll end up learning it myself. This expectation wasn't logical as those words aren't spoken anywhere else in my day, except when I'm in office, for 2-3 hours. So I needed to ask questions. The threat of being scolded or being poised as "stupid/ignorant" person stopped me from asking questions, but restricted me to understand their jargon. (That's another reason added to why I won't like working in office list:)
As a solution, now I'll
Be more confrontational
Focus on "why" I am asking a particular question
Leave the internship if things go south 🤷♂️
Last thing which I will be mindful of this month is avoiding preemptive behaviour. This actually is linked with the more subtle and more deeply rooted "Overthinking" tendency which I am fighting now. I overthink future. You don't do that okay. You don't know how many times you'll actually like the event/place where in the present moment you are scared to go.
Recently a dinner happened at NUST. I was asked to attend as a student usher. Now I was like nah. I don't like being formal, having to wear a three piece and telling people which chair to sit on. It is a waste of my time. But for the sake of internship, I had to go. Surprisingly, I liked it much. My ma'am asked me to 'network'; that is to take cards and LinkedIn profiles of all coming guests. I did of about half but, I enjoyed talking to these people. All of them are successful in their minds. I was happy to see them. May they remain so.
And the food was yum. And I met another prospective internship, this time for creative writing, in the same event. And something happened that night once all the guests were gone, which I never would have experienced if I wasn't there. The event was a success, personally and professionally.
At another night this month, I was about to cry after a lazy 🦥 day. (Actually when I am being lazy, now I preempt that I'm going to get depressed because of this waste of time). But I picked up my basketball and went playing. In the court, I met a Srilankan guy. We played 1-1 halfcourt. I lost 18-28. It was one of the best nights of this month. I successfully restricted myself to waste more time crying over already wasted time. You are cordially invited to take such steps in your life.
Start now, if you are surfing internet and you shouldn't be, give yourself a time of 10 minutes. Scroll for 10 more minutes, then start some work. Start the most difficult work, if it's morning. Start the most urgent work if it's evening.
May you have productive and fun time ahead.
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